Listen to me: Do not make the classic blunder of overeating before they bring the best. In this temple to gluttony, show restraint. There’s a steak you want, and if it’s not the first to be knifed onto your plate, ask for it. It’s the picanha. Pee-cahn-yah. You won’t find it in an American steakhouse—Brazilian butchers carve up a cow’s rump differently. The top is covered with fat, seasoned with rock salt, and cooked over flames so the fat seeps down and blends with the salt to remind you that you didn’t climb to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian. Ask me where I’d go for my last steak and I couldn’t say exactly. Maybe Marius in Rio, or Plataforma in New York, or Porcão in Miami. I’d keep waiting for more picanha, and the meal would never end.
Meat with fire

Yesterday I found myself with an absolutely monumental hangover, immobilised and struck by thoughts like “If only I could throw up or fall asleep, I’d have some sweet relief.” However, unable to manage either I just sort of ambled through the day as best as I could manage. I wasn’t exactly thrilled to hear I that my folks had press ganged me into running the barbecue for them later that evening, with guests on the way. But, somehow I managed to run the grill without passing out on top of it, and seemed to do a fairly decent job (ie. the chicken wasn’t undercooked, the steak wasn’t overcooked, and nobody caught fire). My favourite aunt (who I haven’t seen in entirely too long) and I then proceeded to knock back a few quiets and hold court out on the deck. At least the day wasn’t entirely wasted.